The Brawlers Take the Real World
by EmilySamara
Summary: Marth, Ike, Link, Pit, Roy, and Samus are bored. So they decide to visit the real world! Get ready, world... THE BRAWLERS ARE HERE!
1. Chapter 1

**It's funny... I read somewhere that Ike is voiced by athlete Jason Adkins somewhere, so I decided to make his outfit sports-oriented. I guess Samus would look good in just about anything, though. Read and review!**

Pit, Marth, Ike, and Roy's mood could be summed up in five simple words: _bored out of their skulls._

They had literally tried _everything_. They had prank-called the paranoid Meta Knight (with amusing but unduplicateable results), watched an action movie marathon on _E!_, surfed the web, played some Brawl, _brawled_, and had created and eaten gigantic, monstrous sandwiches with everything they could find in the refrigerator.

And it was noon on a beautiful day.

"I am so bored I'm _wilting_," Marth said, slumping down on a couch. "At least you can fly, Pit."

Pit was attempting to amuse himself by hovering in midair for about three minutes at a time. "Um... yeah, I guess." He fell down on the couch next to Marth. "Or not."

Roy crossed his legs over the arm of the couch and laid his head on Marth's lap. "I wanna _do _something!"

"Well then, Roy," Ike said, raising his eyebrows. "A bit mature for a fifteen-year-old, dontcha think?"

"Oh, shut up."

"Roy, why is your head on my lap?" Marth asked, facepalming.

"Because."

"Agh, why do you always have to irritate everyone?" Ike asked Roy angrily.

Samus walked into the room. "Don't you guys have _any _ideas of what I can write?" She asked miserably. "I'm a bounty hunter, not a writer. You guys give me such great ideas when you're not all schlumped around like this."

"You guys!" Link yelled from the door. "You guys! You guys you guys you guys you guys you guys!"

"WHAT?" Pit, Ike, Marth, Roy, and Samus yelled.

"I found out something we can do today!"

"Seriously?" Roy was so happily surprised that he fell off the couch.

"Yeah!"

"What can we do, then?" Marth asked.

"We... wait for it..." Link paused, savoring the moment. "GO TO THE REAL WORLD!"

"We _what_?" Everyone yelled.

"Look, it's quite simple, guys. We hop into the interdimensional transporter, and we're changed into modern versions of ourselves and we try to make it in the real world!"

"Welllllll... I dunnoooooo..." Marth said cautiously.

"Six words," Link said. "REAL-WORLD SUSHI ALL THE TIME!"

And that, of course, was the tipping point.

...

"You guys ready?" Link asked.

Marth, Ike, Roy, Pit, and Samus nodded and joined hands with Link.

"So... we just jump?" Marth asked.

"Yep."

"Piece o'cake," Pit said confidently.

"E-easy for you to say, Angel Boy," Roy said nervously.

"I'll go first," Ike volunteered bravely. He looked down into the dark, purple, swirling void that would transport them to Earth. He gulped.

"Ike... if anything happens to you..." Marth choked out. "Can I have your iPod?"

"What? No!"

"Darn."

"Okay. On three, I'll jump. One... two..."

"Oh, I forgot to tell you," Link said quickly. "You might die."

"Wh-wh-wh-what?" Ike said before falling in. "Aaaaaah!"

"WE MIGHT DIE?" Roy screamed. "I AM SO NOT DOING THIS!"

Link relaxed. "Relax, you crazy ginger. You can't die. Geronimoooooo!"

"I am a brave priiiiiiiiince!" Marth yelled as he jumped.

"Why are you guys making such a big deal out of thiiiiiiiiiiiiiis?" Pit asked as he jumped.

Roy teetered on the edge of the void. "Maybe I should just..."

"GO!" Samus yelled as she shoved him in. She jumped in without yelling anything. Yelling was _so_ infantile.

...

"Ugh..." Pit moaned as his eyes fluttered open to greet a brilliant, cloudless sky. He sat up. The limp bodies of Marth, Ike, Link, Roy, and Samus were strewn all around him.

Pit looked down. Instead of his normal toga, he was wearing a white, zipped sweatshirt that concealed his wings, faded, ripped blue jeans, and sandals.

"Pit, that you?" Marth groaned as he sat up. He was dressed in a blue hoodie, dark blue skinny jeans, and blue Converse sneakers. His tiara was gone, and his hair seemed more bluish-black than dark blue.

"Yeah. I feel... kinda weird..."

"Yeah. You look different, dressed like that." Marth peered closer at Pit. "Well... you could pass for any normal teenager. What about me?"

Pit gave Marth a thumbs-up. "Perfect."

Marth knelt down next to Ike. "Hey, man," he said softly. "Wake up."

Ike stirred and opened his eyes. "Whoa..." he muttered, checking out his new gear: a red, zipped hoodie nearly identical to Pit's, an Adidas sweatband, cargo shorts, and Nikes.

"Whoa, dude, you're like a walking billboard for athletics," Link laughed as he stood up. Link wore a green sweatshirt, a green snowboarder cap, khaki pants, and green-and-white sneakers.

"You guys look really normal," Samus said approvingly. She wore a stylish light blue hoodie, skinny jeans, and black, high-heeled boots.

"Hey, where's Roy?" Marth asked suddenly. Before they could start to panic, a voice answered.

"Here," Roy grunted, staggering to his feet. He wore a bright red hoodie like Marth's, dark blue jeans, and red sneakers. His headband had the same design, but seemed more modern.

"Well..." Pit said, looking around. "I wonder where we are?"

Marth and Samus, the richest of the group, patted their pockets.

Samus drew out a fat wallet. "Don't matter where we are, hon. I've got a load of cash and a bunch of credit cards."

"Same here," Marth smiled. "Samus... you're twenty-one, right?"

Samus rolled her eyes. "You guys are gonna need different names, too. I could be... Samara, I guess. Ugh, that's _so _girly... call me Sam."

"I could be Marcelus, but you call me Marth for short," Marth suggested.

Samus nodded. "Good idea, Marth."

"And same for me, but I'll be Lincoln," Link said.

"Good... Pit?"

"I'll be Angel, but you call me Pit 'cause of Super Smash Bros.," Pit said.

"Smart." Samus smiled. Pit blushed.

"And Ike and Roy... well, you can be Ike and Roy."

"Sweet." Ike and Roy high-fived each other.

"Well, I'll get to work forging you guys some liscenses and stuff. In the meantime, try to stay out of trouble."

The number of "we promises" was five.

The number of crossed fingers behind backs was also five.

**Foreshadowing! I know it wasn't my best work, but the first chapter in a series is just an introduction. It's never the best. And now, I have a Science QUIZ. Lucky me. By the way, the characters will still be referred to by their real names. Otherwise it seems OCish.**


	2. Chapter 2

The five boys stood outside a restaurant. (Yes I know, not very gripping. Stay with me.)

"Applebee's?" Ike asked, confused. "Who dedicates a restaurant to serving apples and bees?"

Marth facepalmed. "Ike. They don't _actually _serve apples and bees. It's just the name of the restaurant."

"Well, that's stupid. Who would name a restaurant 'Applebee's'?"

Pit patted his pocket and pulled out his phone.

"What are you doing?" Roy asked.

"Googling. Let's see... hum. Apparently it was originally 'T.J. Applebee's,' but they changed it for some reason."

"Don't care. I'm hungry. Let's go." Ike led the earthified brawlers through the doors and into the crowded restaurant.

"Party of five?" The hostess asked. Marth nodded.

A waitress smiled. "Follow me, please." She led them to a booth near the middle of the restaurant.

"Hi. My name is Abby, and I'll be your server." She tucked a lock of red hair behind her ear. "Can I get you boys some drinks?"

"Um, I'll have a Coke," Ike said.

"Me too," said Marth.

"Same here," Link said.

"Yo tambièn!" Roy said.

Pit started to answer, but Marth cut him off.

"He'll have water," Marth said quickly. Abby giggled.

"'Kay, I'll be right back with those. Here's some menus."

Pit pouted. "Why no soda for Pit?"

"Pit, you know what happens to you when you have caffeine," Marth reminded him. "You go _loca_!"

"What's with all the random use of foreign language?" Ike complained. "This is _America_. Not Mexico or whatever."

...

RANDOMLY PLACED INTERLUDE ALERT

Meanwhile, in a cave that was very black, very deep, very frightening, very foreboding very mythical, and very holy-HOLY-crap-there's-no-way-I'm-ever-going-in-there-EVER-no-way-no-howish, the Angel of Death, Samael, was bored. If you want description of him, click on EmilySamara's profile and read the story where a fan favorite dies.

Now, when Samael is bored, it is VERY bad news for any naive humans that he happens to know, such as certain three certain video game characters who go by the names Marth, Ike, and Pit. Because, see, Samael likes to create very amusing, awkward, and slightly dangerous or life-threatening situations for these poor brawlers and their friends.

So Samael, bored as he was, decided to mess with the brawlers' minds. And Oh My God, amusing events most certainly unfolded.

END OF RANDOMLY PLACED INTERLUDE

...

Roy idly glanced toward the door. He saw two flamboyantly gay teenagers holding hands walk through and sit down at a table near them.

"Now, those guys," Marth said, noticing where Roy was looking, "have got guts."

"Yeah. These days..." Roy replied.

Abby came back with the boys' drinks.

"Thank you," Marth said politely.

"You guys ready to order?" Abby asked.

"Yeah," Link spoke up. "I'll have..."

Link noticed that Abby looked distracted.

"Um, Abby?" Link said, cautiously waving his hand in front of her face.

"Uh-oh," Abby said, looking at the gay teenagers' table. "Things are about to get interesting in here."

"Why?" Roy asked.

Abby pointed with her pencil to a bunch of bad-boyish teenagers who were slowly advancing on the happy couple.

"Those are the Homophobes. And that's _their _area."

Marth stood up. "I'm going over and help those two guys," he said, staring in the same direction Abby was.

Abby shrugged. "Don't say I didn't warn ya."

"But... you didn't warn me."

"Oh, whatever! Just... be careful, 'kay? There, I warned you!"

Marth shrugged and made his way over to the gay teenagers. The Homophobes were already beginning to harrass them.

"Hey. Guys, cut it out," Marth said to the Homophobes.

The gang laughed cruelly. The apparent leader stopped jeering at the gay boys and turned to face Marth.

"MYOB, fag."

Marth's face burned. "Sh-shut up." He held up his fist. "I swear, I'm warning you..."

"Oh-oh no, you guys. I'm... so scared. Can't you see me sweating?" He tugged at his shirt collar mockingly.

Link could see that Marth was about to snap. He motioned for Ike, Roy, and Pit to get up and quickly made his way over to Marth.

"Awww, look. His little _boy_friend's comin' over to help him out."

"Wh-why, you...!" It took the majority of Link's strength to keep both himself and Marth from stomping over and ripping the Homophobes' heads off.

"Yeah! If he even _had _a boyfriend, it would be me!" Ike said inconsequentially.

"Or me!" Roy added, equally inconsequentially.

"Not... helping..." Marth hissed as Link dragged him out.

Pit sighed. "Great. Now we have to look for _another _place to eat."

"Leave it to Marth to get us in trouble on our first day," Ike said disdainfully.

"Oh, shut up," Marth snapped, uncharacteristically angry. "You get us in trouble nine out of ten times we go anywhere."

"_Hey_! Eight out of nine times it's not my fault!"

"Oh, bra-_vo_," said a vaguely familiar, deep voice from behind them. The boys whirled around.

A tall, handsome, silver-haired man wearing a long black trench coat was slowly walking toward them, clapping lifelessly about every three seconds.

Pit and Marth stared at the man. "_Samael...?_"

The disguised Angel of Death rolled his eyes. "Who else?"

"Who's this guy?" Roy asked.

"Oh, him?" Ike said nonchalantly. "He's the Angel of Death."

"HOLY-!"

Samael smiled a teasing little half-smile. "Mmmm. Now, can any of you tell me what Marth did wrong back there?" He asked, jerking his head in the direction of the restaurant.

"Um, lost his temper?" Link ventured.

"Wrong. Anyone else? No? Well... guess I'll have to answer for you." Samael sighed in a pity-me-oh-pity-me kind of way. "Marth... missed a great opportunity to have a really good fight _and _entertain me. Instead, Marth ran away like a scared little pussy. And _that _is wrong."

"Oh, man, please don't take my voice away again," Marth pleaded. "I'll be good! I'll... fight, or whatever it is you want me to do! And... yeah I'll stop talking now."

"Good boy. Now get back in there and smash some faces in, will you?"

**SO SORRY for the lateness of this ****crappy**** update (WILL NOT CRITICIZE MYSELF...!). Anyway, yay, Samael returns! And how will Marth delicately handle this? Answer: what does "delicately" mean? THEY ARE THE BRAWLERS!**


	3. Chapter 3

After Samael left, Marth and the others stood, dumbfounded, in front of the restaurant.

"So, what? You just go in there and fight?" Roy asked.

Marth blinked, realization breaking through. "Um... yeah."

"So... why aren't you moving?"

Marth shook his head vigorously. "Well..."

"Dude. Are you _scared_?" Ike asked incredulously.

"NO! Of course not!"

Ike put his arm around Marth's shoulders. "Look, Marth, you're my best friend." Ike ignored Roy, who was clearing his throat loudly. "We're like two sides of a sword. I'm the brawn, you're the brains. But right here, right now, this is _your _fight."

Link blinked. "Wow, Ike, that was probably the most intellectual thing I've ever heard you say."

"Why, thank y-HEY! That's an INSULT!"

Ignoring Ike, Pit stepped up to offer Marth his support. "Look, Marth, those Homophobe clowns are like undecided voters. They're the biggest idiots on the planet. If you just smile, dodge their fists, and act calm-which, I might add, you are _very _good at doing-it's just gonna tear 'em to pieces."

Marth rubbed his hands together and exhaled. "Okay. So, basically, I get on their nerves?"

"Exactly, my friend. Exactly."

...

When the boys stepped back in, Abby immediately waved them over.

"I'm starting to really like you," Ike said when they got to her. "Do you have a boyfriend?"

Abby sighed, exasperated. "Are you gonna fight those guys or not?"

"You better believe it, sister," Marth said as he made his way over to the gay-hating gang.

The poor gay couple was close to tears of humiliation and anger. The Homophobes were stealing their money, ruining their food, and worse. You probably would have wanted to fight them too. No, yes you would. Shut up.

"Hey," Marth said forcefully. The leader glanced up at him lazily, like he had all the time in the world.

"Oh, look, it's your _boy_friend," the leader snickered to the couple. One whimpered. Marth felt sick and furious.

"You leave them alone," Marth said quietly, but with a steel edge to his voice. Ike flashed him a silent thumbs-up from behind the gang, ready to assist Marth at any second.

"Or what, Miss? You gonna... what's she gonna do, boys?"

"I'll tell you what I'm gonna do," Marth growled, but before he could do anything, one of the gay boys stood up and started straightening the collar of Marth's shirt. (During one of the intermissions, he took his sweatshirt off. Sorry for not telling you.)

"Dude! Not... not right now!" Marth said to the well-meaning teen.

"Good luck!" The other whispered as the leader advanced on Marth.

"Awww, now ain't that sweet," the leader crooned.

"Not as sweet as _my _victory's gonna taste," Marth retorted.

"Hey!" One of the gang members standing in the back called. "Look! He does got a boyfriend! Standin' back here! With the weird hair and-"

Well, he stopped talking then. Or rather lost the ability to speak. I mean, it's kind of hard to speak with a load of Ike-fist in your mouth.

The gang leader charged at Marth, as did two of his lackeys, while the rest went for an evilly grinning Ike.

Marth didn't just dodge, he jumped and flipped over the leader's head. Before anyone even had a chance to marvel at Marth's gymnastic ability, he had tackled the leader.

Even though the leader was bigger than Marth, Marth had a few advantages: he didn't lose his head in a tackle fight, and he was a brawler, after all.

Marth wasn't trying to best the leader in a tackle fight. Marth was smart; he knew that he was too small and skinny to do that. But Marth did happen to know the exact spot of many pressure points of the human body. Man, that huge gang leader didn't have a chance against skinny little Marth Lowell of Altea.

As their leader stopped struggling and started snoring, his two friend roared stupidly at Marth and charged him-from opposite directions. I think many people know how this will end up...

As Marth landed from his jump and the two chargers fell to the floor, moaning and holding their heads, two of the members who had previously been getting the crap kicked out of them by Ike turned on Marth, but didn't charge him.

"You're a smart little girl, ain'tcha?" One said angrily. But before he could trash-talk any more, a slightly high-pitched battle cry interrupted him and a scrawny little red-haired kid landed next to Marth.

"_Roy...!_"

Roy tossed his hair over his shoulder, which looked really stupid because his hair was pretty short.

"Who else? You thought maybe another dashingly handsome swordsman would come to your aid?"

There was a beat of silence, and the whole restaurant (who had been watching the fight) burst into laughter. Everyone, obviously including the Homophobes, was laughing-except for five certain boys and two certain homosexual boys.

Roy was so mad he was shaking. The color of his face perfectly matched his flaming hair.

"Aw, hey, look, he's all mad. I'm so sca-AHHHHHHH!"

He was cut off as Roy let out an even louder battle roar and tackled the gang member head-on.

Now, Roy was even smaller than Marth. You might think that he couldn't possibly win a tackle fight. Ever.

But Roy was arguably angrier than he'd ever been in his life. And Roy was not as rational as Marth in a fight. Or ever, really. He would only stop when either he or his opponent stopped breathing. Or moving and struggling, in this case, thankfully.

After Roy removed his hands from the member's throat, the few remaining members geared up for a fight. But any fool could see that they weren't quite as enthusiastic and confident as they had been at the beginning.

"Let's see... Ike had his fight, Roy's obviously satisfied, I took out the leader..." Marth murmured, ticking off on his fingers. "Link votes to abstain... guess that leaves you, Pit."

"Finally!" Pit said happily as he joined Marth's side of the fight.

The remaining Homophobes stared, then broke out into nervous laughter. One started to charge Pit.

Pit didn't react.

The Homophobe blinked, then ran faster and faster, his eyes wide with desparation.

Just as the Homophobe member was about to collide with him, Pit held out his hand. Instantly, the Homophobe was blasted into the wall by Pit's awesome angelic powers. (Yeah... he doesn't use them in the game. That doesn't mean he can't.)

The reamining two gang members looked at each other for a split second, passed an understanding, and hightailed it out the door, leaving their friends' bodies crumpled on the floor of the restaurant.

"ALL RIGHT!" Ike exploded, pumping his fist into the air.

"True that!" Marth replied happily.

The gay couple finally recovered from their shock and stood up to thank Marth, Ike, Pit, and Roy. They thanked Link too, because he had helped Marth keep his head.

"But why?" They kept asking. "Why would you choose to help your fellow man like that? No one ever does that."

"Look," Marth explained. "I... I don't even really know. People used to do that to me all the time, and... I know how it feels."

"Ahhh... so you're like us?"

Marth blinked, then started laughing hysterically.

"It never fails! I swear to you, my friends... always! Always people assume I'm queer! I'M NOT!"

"Oh... sorry."

"S'okay," Marth murmured as he left with his friends. "It never fails... _always_..."

**Yay! The brawlers triumph! And, by the way... we're assuming that there were about 10-11 members of the Homophobes here. Just to give you a rough picture. Poor Marth. Even gay guys assume he's gay. Oh well. And hopefully I will continue this!**


	4. Chapter 4

"Be still, my beating heart," Marth murmured as he, Ike, Pit, Link, Roy, and Samus stood before a beautiful, shining, glorious, twenty-story five-star hotel.

"Is this where we're staying?" Ike asked, unable to take his eyes off the sight.

Samus smiled with obvious self-satisfaction. "Yup. Look, guys, I'm a hot blonde with a credit card in hand. I bet we got the best room in the house."

Link rolled his eyes. "Whenever someone says that in a book or something, that person and their party always end up sleeping in the basement or the supply closet."

...

"Okay, okay... I stand corrected," Link said, gaping at the penthouse suite Samus had secured for them.

"How many bedrooms is this place?" Marth whispered in awe.

"Six. Because there is _no _way I'm sharing a room with any of you five."

"Ordinarily I'd be insulted, but this place is sweet!" Ike dashed to the mini-fridge. "Samus, you're incredible!"

Samus smiled.

...

After approximately two hours spent eating food and candy from the mini-fridge, watching T.V., admiring the view for miles of whatever state they were in, and exploring the apartment, the six brawlers regrouped in the main room to get serious.

"Did you find out where we are yet?" Pit asked, biting into a chocolate bar.

Samus nodded and smiled that familiar, enchanting smile. "Los Angeles."

"_Awesome_! Isn't that the place where it's, like... there are casinos and stuff?" Ike asked incredulously.

"I guessss so..." Samus said unsurely for the first time that day. "I don't really know that much about the real world."

"WOW! ARE YOU SERIOUS? DO I ACTUALLY KNOW MORE ABOUT SOMETHING THAN _SAMUS ARAN?_"

"Well... yes, Ike, you do. Congratulations," Samus said, gracious in defeat.

Ike flopped backwards onto the plush carpet. "Sweet. Is there anything about this place I _don't _love?"

"Dude!" Marth said indignantly. "Have you already forgotten about the Great Battle of Applebee's?"

"Oh yeah..."

"So, Samus, didn't they give you any funny looks when you asked for a room for one chick and five guys?" Marth asked, popping the top off a can of soda.

"Um, no. Maybe they assumed you and Pit were girls."

Marth rolled his eyes and took a sip.

"Speaking of girls, I wish I'd remembered to ask for that cute waitress's number," Ike said wistfully.

Link rolled his eyes again. "Do you even remember her name, Ike?"

"Ummm... Anna, wasn't it?"

"_Abby_!" Pit, Marth, Link, and Roy yelled.

"Okay, okay, I made a mistake for once in my life!"

"Why don't you go back to Applebee's and ask her for it?" Samus asked. "You could do with a girl in your life!"

"Nah, I can't. She said it was the end of her shift. I'll go tomorrow."

"Hmmm... speaking of that, what's on the agenda for tomorrow?" Pit asked.

"We could go see a movie," Link suggested.

"Lame," was the universal response.

"Go to a theme park?" Roy suggested.

"Roy, you are not yet man enough to go on many of the rides," Ike said wisely.

"HEY! I may be short, but I'm not that short!"

"I didn't say _tall _enough. I said _man _enough. You, my short ginger friend, lack manliness."

"Ooooh, burn," Pit smiled.

"Oh... oh yeah?"

"Leave it, Roy," Marth sighed. "Hmmm... what can we do?"

"Let's figure it out tomorrow," Ike sighed. "I'm so tired right now."

"Yeah, me too," Roy said, yawning.

"Let's see... well, today we tested out the cool stuff in our room. Let's say tomorrow we check out the cool stuff in the whole hotel." Samus suggested.

"Sounds like a plan," Link said. "But it'll have to wait until tomorrow. I am _totally _burned-out."

Samus, Marth, Pit, Ike, and Roy sleepily nodded their agreement as they stumbled off to bed.

...

Approximately eight hours later, Marth (the earliest riser) opened his eyes to streaming sunlight coming in through the window. He smiled a contented smile, and a feeling of calm bliss washed over him. That feeling of calm one gets when it's the first day of a three-day weekend with no homework, on the first day of vacation, the first day of summer.

Marth yawned and sat up in bed. The digital clock on his bedside table read 7:30.

Rubbing his eyes, Marth stumbled into the mini-kitchen. To his surprise, Pit was already up.

"Mornin', Marth," Pit greeted Marth cheerfully.

"How long've you been up?" Marth asked.

"Since seven. After a while I realized that it wouldn't be good for me to sleep with covers on, so my bed's a wreck, and it took me so long to get comfortable that I got, like, four hours of sleep."

Marth winced. "Ouch."

Pit nodded. "Yeah. You want some hot cocoa? They've got coffee too, but it's gross."

"Yeah, I'll take cocoa. Thanks, man." After idly analyzing the conversation, Marth realized a mildly disturbing fact: he and his friends were acting a bit more like ordinary teenagers instead of brawlers now that they were in the real world. But then he remembered the Great Battle of Applebee's. He concluded that they would always house some brawl-like tendencies, no matter what their surroundings were.

"Hey, Pit," Marth called as Pit was making cocoa.

"Mmmm?" Pit responded.

"I've always wondered... just how exactly _do _you sleep?"

"On my stomach," Pit said simply. "Why?"

"Oh... I dunno. I just kind of thought... isn't it inconvenient?"

"If it were between flying and sleeping on my back," Pit said wisely, "I'd choose flying."

"Good point. I wish I could fly."

"Well, you can't. Ha ha."

"Oh, don't be infantile!" Marth said, quoting a cartoon he had seen on the Internet.

"You're the one who wants to fly," Pit snickered.

Marth rolled his eyes.

"Here's your cocoa, prince man," Pit said, setting a mug in front of Marth.

"Wow," Marth said. "I just realized something."

"What?"

"Put in a different context, this could totally be a scene from a Pirth yaoi fanfic. From when I started talking to you."

"Oh my goddess... you're right... I would, like, be making your breakfast, and we would be living together... and we'd probably be, like, flirting right now." Pit laughed. "Oh, wow. That is messed up. And I can totally see that. Wow. That's creepy."

The two of them heard a noise of creaking bedsprings from Ike's room. Seconds later, he lurched into the mini-kitchen rubbing sleep from his eyes and scowled at their amused faces.

"Who gets up this early?" Ike griped. "This is a vacation for us."

"Oh, don't be such a grouch," Pit chastised him. "I was up a half-hour before this. You want some cocoa?"

"Yeah, thanks."

"Nice jammies, by the way," Pit called, smiling as Ike scowled again. Unlike Marth and Pit, who were wearing t-shirts and flannel pajama pants in blue and white, respectively, Ike wore a red t-shirt paired inappropriately with sky-blue flannel pants with fluffy sheep covering them.

Marth snickered. "Where'd you get those pants? I want them. Sheep are, like, all the rage these days."

Still scowling, Ike rested his chin on his hand and spoke out of one side of his mouth. "Only thing in my dresser. Some maintenance guy's got a sick sense of humor."

"Probably Samus," Pit laughed, setting a steaming mug of hot cocoa in front of Ike. "Cheer up. Hot chocolate helps, guaranteed."

Ike shrugged and took a sip. "Oh man, you're right. That is _really _sweet."

"Hey, I want cocoa!" A female voice said, making all of them jump. Samus smiled.

"Ahhh... scared me. I'll get you cocoa." Pit said.

"Well... anyways, on the agenda... I looked up all the hotel's facilities." Samus laid a bunch of printed-out papers on the table. "They've got a pool... with a waterslide and six waterfalls and-"

"Yeah... I don't care," Pit interrupted. "I can't swim."

"Yeah... I don't care that you don't care. You can ride the skyline thing."

"I TOTALLY call first on the bungee jump thing," Ike said. "Link and Roy are snoozin'... and they're losin'."

**Sorry for the late update... I should be more on top of things. Earth Science test tomorrow, wish me luck! This is not over!**


	5. Chapter 5

After Roy and Link woke up, the group located the bathing suits that Samus had thoughtfully bought for them and traipsed down to the lobby.

"Okay... now we split up," Samus said, taking charge. "Ike wants to go on the bungee jump and Pit can't swim... and Link can't swim with a hat on, so you three can be a group. And Marth and Roy and I'll go to the pool."

"Sounds like a plan," Marth said cheerfully. "Come on, guys. I want to try the waterslide."

...

"Oh, man! This water's great!" Roy exclaimed after surfacing from a dive. "Sam, you're crazy! Get in!" He called to the blonde figure reclining on a chaise lounge. She didn't stir.

"C'mon, man, you've already got a hot blonde after you. Guinevere, right? So give it a rest." Marth ducked underwater and resurfaced quickly. "It's hard work keeping a long-distance girlfriend. But I do it fine with Shiida."

Roy rolled his eyes. "Oh, please. It's better to have seven. If one goes crazy or dies in battle or something... you've got _six more _to choose from." With effort, Roy floated on his back. "Life is good, my bluenette friend."

Marth rolled his eyes good-naturedly and glanced toward the diving board just in time to see someone execute a perfect dive.

"Nice job!" Marth called as the diver surfaced. Her head whipped around.

"Thanks!" She giggled. She swam over. Roy immediately rolled off his back.

"Um... do I know you?" Roy asked, running his hand through his wet red hair.

"You kind of look familiar," the girl said, squeezing out her equally damp ginger locks. "What's your name?"

"Roy... and this is my friend Marth."

The girl raised her eyebrows. "Um... did I hear you right?"

Marth rolled his eyes. "Yeah, Marth. Short for Marcelus."

"Ahhh. That makes sense." There was an awkward beat of silence.

"So... do you have a name?" Marth asked, smiling.

"Oh! Right! Sorry! I'm Abby... Abby McCullen."

"Oh, hey! You work at Applebee's!" Marth remembered.

"Yeah, you were our waitress," Roy informed her.

Abby gaped at them. "No way! I thought you looked familiar! You were the guys who took out the Homophobes!"

"You better believe it, lady," Roy said proudly.

"Yeah, you were the one who went insane and tackled that big guy!"

Roy blushed and bowed his head. "Um, yeah... that was me," he said softly.

"That was so cool!" Roy looked up. "I... those guys just make me so mad! And you!" She turned to Marth. "You were so good! What made you come back in?"

Marth opened his mouth, tried to think of a lie, and realized something: _The best way to get people to not believe you is to tell the truth._

"Well... the Angel of Death, Samael, said that I had irritated him by leaving and pretty much forced me to go in there and beat up those guys."

Abby blinked spastically, then burst into laughter.

"You are so funny! How did you come up with that?"

"Uh..." Marth hastily changed the subject. "What are you doing here, anyway? Do you live here?"

"Oh, no. I'm staying with my friend in an apartment near here. We come here to swim a lot, but she had to work today."

"Hmmm... hey. Do you remember our other friend? The one with spiky hair and an Adidas sports band?"

"Oh, yeah, him! He was kinda cute. And funny. What's his name?"

"Ike. Ike Gawain. He's staying here with us, but he's off doing the bungee jump."

"Oh! Um... will you give him my number when he comes?"

"No."

"Hey! Why not?"

"Because you can give it to him yourself," Marth replied, pointing at the door.

"Oh! Hey! Marth! Roy! And... Allie, right?" Ike called, running toward them.

"ABBY!" Marth, Roy, and Abby yelled, earning them several peculiar looks from fellow swimmers.

"Oh, whatever! Well, um... did you want to know my name?"

"Already know it... Isaac," Abby smirked.

"Um, it's Ike... oh! Hey! You just made fun of me! Oh! That is a mean thing to do!"

"Burn, Ike," Roy and Marth laughed.

"Well... you call me Abby, I call you Ike. Deal?"

"You give me your number, I give you mine. Deal?"

"Deal." They shook on it.

**Well... good ending point, I think. And a pretty quick update, considering. And I guess i like last names beginning with the prefix Mc-. By the way... I haven't quite decided on Abby's personality yet. Suggestions are appreciated, but I may disregard them. XD.**


End file.
